DARE TO BE IMPERFECT

One day I saw a lady wearing a shirt with the caption ‘She died of perfection’.

The other day I saw a movie titled ‘Black Swan’ also on the dangers of being perfect.

Sheer coincidence.  

In the film the protagonist, a ballerina is a very committed dancer and a true perfectionist. When other ballerina competes for her role in a play the pressure to retain the spot causes the protagonist to slowly lose grip on the reality and she had a living nightmare every day. She however retained the position in the play on the show day. But without realizing apparently, she slowly killed herself in the process. After the play the cast gather together to congratulate her, only to find her severely bleeding. Her last whispers were “I felt it. Perfect. It was perfect.” and she died.

All this kept me thinking.

Many a times I am a tough nut to crack. I may seem soft and docile on the outside but it is very difficult to change me when I have a point of view. My close ones know me best. And they have been stunned by my strong retaliations. This tough stand has proved to be good many a times, sometimes bad, sometimes worse.

These tough stances have made me make the great and best choices (which may have seemed to be stupid wait to others). But many a times when I want things to be done a certain way and if things don’t go the way I desire I become neurotic. It takes the better of me.

I've learnt the lesson now. Don’t be tough on you. Dare to be imperfect (or rather be accommodating) and bring out something new in you.

CHANGE – are you ready to brace the unknown

How many times have we heard this adage ‘Change is the only constant thing is life.’

But do we embrace change fearlessly.

My best laid plans have burst apart. In such times I fear a part of me is losing myself or that I am not able to control the situation in my hand. Do I burst apart now?

What has happened cannot be erased or changed. Atleast I can embrace the present and be more accommodating.

Your power not lies in steadfastly controlling the situation. You only become domineering, neurotic and become blind to the options around.

In tough times your beauty lies in letting go off the plan/ situation, see what new unfurls in front of you and immediately grasping that idea into your life.

Even trees enjoy their process of change or to put it aptly the process of revelation and renovation. It does not crib but responds immediately to the various changing conditions around. Ultimately it enjoys the bounty and the change it sees in it after every season. Yet it lays strong in its roots and remains unshackled whatever the condition it is in. It stands TALL, STRONG and PROUD.

I've learnt a lesson or two from the bounty tree. Not to fear changes as death but rather see it as a new birth and a possibility to see something new in you. If you consider like that life will be better off in the end.

So I've let things to sail on its own terms. It puts your life at ease. You are able to appreciate yourself more and also enjoy the beauty and bounty around you. 

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I presume I've come to a point of life now to accept things as they are and not ramble too much about the things around. (A part of evolution in me?) Hence there's no serious thinking involved as I've let things to sail on its own terms. And hence the empty blog for a while...with nothing to update to. I'll return to this little space of mine (my blog) very soon. 

And during this time, I've only been aimlessly scribbling on the other blog (another comfort zone of mine)....and it has been fun too! 

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Its been long time since I updated this blog space. Been busy on few chores and little extra time was devoted to my new blog. I wish to devote time equally to both blogs in the future. 

And my lappy had gone wild and isn't working well for the past few days. Its driving me crazy. Supposedly there is some problem with the hard drive and on times when I want to work my laptop, it gets shutdown. That's also the reason why I didn't update this space for long. Hope I get it repaired soon. It had been dearer to me for more than three years! That was the first thing I bought after I joined my work.

And what kept me ecstatic during these laptop strike out days was our 'New Ipad'. We hadn't intended to buy the Ipad at this point of time. But my husband has some 'To-buy' lists in which he had this. Some others include his coveted DSLR camera, sports bike etc etc. Crazy but nice guy he is. Couple of weeks back, he tactfully convinced me and dragged me to buy the Ipad on the same day. I was dilly-dallying and was in a indecisive state on whether to get it or not. We got the Ipad in hand a week later. Even the first few days after we got it, I was not much into it. But believe me after I got hands on it, I am going gaga over it now.

I was having my Ipod, hence working on this Ipad was a lot same and easier. But its a lot more interesting than the Ipod. And the range of AppStore applications is amazing. Its now my one stop place for news, entertainment and fun. The ease with which you can install the apps and navigate through different things makes you get hooked to it. Very handy. One thing which I found difficult was typing long texts with the touch screen keyboard. But that doesn't have to bother me now as we've ordered for a bluetooth keyboard. There's no doubt I'll prowl over it now.

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Hurray…after a lot of hiccups and pauses, my another blog child is born.

I’ve created a new food blog ‘www.sugicooks.blogspot.com’. This blog is not just about the chronicles of my experiments with food and cooking but more about the ‘Celebration of food’ and the good feel it brings into our life. Hope you read my new blog and support me in my new endeavor…

And to go on lines with this new blog, I’ve renamed my present blog as ‘www.sugiwrites.blogspot.com’.

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Got these interesting two pics from FB. This should be the condition of most of the Indian couples abroad. And indeed, this is the state of both of us now!

This is one of those times where I have plenty of time at my disposal, yet don't know what to do. Feeling like a caged bird wanting to fly high up in the sky. I am not destined for just the role of a 'HW'. What example will I set for my daughter/ kids if I be complacent in this state? I want to let them know 'not to be deterred in your ambitions and passions whatever be the condition, wherever you are'.  

I can see my mom,mil and many others pondering years later now of the lost and precious times. And they believe its too late a time for realization now, after being habituated the role of HW for many years. Oh, I wish to revert this state of mine soon before I think its too late!

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Wind chimes – their sounds are so pleasant to hear on a windy day.

Laughing Buddha – seeing it makes me instantly happy

Smell of agarbhattis/ scented candles – these aroma inside your house gives a divine and relaxed feeling

Bronze Vinayagar statue – heightened divinity

Floating candles in pot with flower petals – serene!

Fish tank – you can find one to the right side of my blog. I don’t have the heart to remove them.

Smell of sand when it rains – divine

Smell of petrol and crackers (sounds weird?!)

Small kids – I cannot resist watching those pinkish chubby cheeks, cute little fingers, two little ponies, cute dress and shoes

Car driving (but I haven’t drove one singlehandedly yet, apart from the learning classes which I did to get my license. Whenever I watch anyone driving a car, the wild side of me will feel like pushing him/ her out to the other side and jump into the drivers position)

Travelling - I'll never complain of having to travel anywhere long and hard. Truely adventurism! 

Shopping, even if it is aimless window shopping - the curious me!

Neat and uncluttered space in home and office desk

Good set of books - wish to maintain a good small library in home

Good relaxing music, particularly Buddhist meditation tracks

Cooking – the perfect creative outlet

And oh, I missed my latest ones…the ‘Nando’s chicken’ and ‘Fish and Chips’ eating outlet in Melbourne…gosh!, they are finger licking good! Perfect to have them hot and spicy on a rainy evening. Its raining incessesently here for the whole day and I am drooling to have them now!!

One more recent addition - yoga!

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This meditative Buddha doesn't just seem a statue to me. To me, it seems to be such a living form sending so much positive vibes. Whenever you see it, you get such a tranquil, calm feeling and the gentle smile on its face makes me instantly happy. Today many office reception desks have them and you also find them in many shopping stores selling many forms of these Buddha statues. I go crazy over them that whenever I happen to see them I don't hesitate a moment to grab a look. I wish to get one of them in my home also. I just love golden bronze and marble white Buddha's!

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Months of domesticity has cramped up my mind and body. So I thought this is the time to indulge in physical activity of some kind. The easiest thing to do is brisk walking but the lazy me prevented me from waking up early in the morning. The other things that came to my mind are yoga and swimming which I’ve yearned to do for years. Either I did not find the time or did not find the proper place to learn them.  

Now, atlast I’ve discovered yoga through ‘Breathe’, the yoga and pilates center in Melbourne. Atlast it has given me the space to breathe. You are more attuned to your body by learning yoga and pilates. You stretch and flex your body and burn out. At the end of it I feel light and full of energy. Happy that I am learning them now and want to discover about it more. 

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Three years since 2008 and three new cities lived – Seoul, Mumbai, Chennai…

…and now moved to Melbourne !!

Different cities, different culture, different people, different encounters…each city brought out something new in me and made me grow more as a person.

Fresh out of college, moving to Seoul was an enriching experience. This city opened my eyes to the world. Though it was a much unknown place, the friendly and courteous people made me feel at home. It was a short and awesome stay there. Many a times now, I have yearned to travel back to this city atleast once and relive those memories.

It was then to Mumbai, the cosmopolitan Indian city, with the hustle and bustle all around all time. This buoyant city with its upbeat people always keeps you on your toes. I experienced both khatta-meetha facets of my life in this city.

And it was then to Namma Chennai. It felt good being back to my own place with dear ones nearby. And the wonderful work in the new company made me upbeat.  But, God! The scorching heat here made me go slain. However, this is the city which gave me everlasting sweet memories hanging around with my special loved one and my family.

And now packed bags and moved to Melbourne! A truly cosmopolitan city it is. The nature in this country is out of the world and these people are known for their hedonistic lifestyle. All these touches you in a good way. Exploring this city is fun and I wish to discover more about me through this city.

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I am all ears to take ideas, opinions and advices from others, but if they are imposed upon I will be in no mood to take attitude from anyone. This is one life I can live and explore and I don’t wish to live by standards dictated by others. And I hate comparisons in any form.

I am not at all being dogmatic or headstrong. To play the many roles I am expected to in my life – a good daughter, wife, Dil, sister, friend…, I know I need to be flexible and adaptable and a person with an open mind. Only then others will warm up to me.  But I cannot stand on anything that is thrust upon me. I wish to maintain my individuality in any relationship.

Appreciate the good of others but know the REAL YOU and live the way you wish to lead your life. Cast aside all uneasiness and try to be objective and maintain your principles and live by your standards. Good or bad you will be very much contended for having lived your life the way you wanted. 

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Phew….3 months of withdrawal from intellectual pursuits and every minute of it I felt some part of me was terribly missing…I am lost and dead if I keep my thinking caps out…

I think and therefore I am…

I write and therefore I am…

Therefore, I am back to my safe haven…writing…to pour out my suppressed thoughts and emotions and be rest assured that it will not lash me out for my out of the blue thinking

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When cooking is done with passion, it is such a pleasure. I enjoy the whole cooking process. I never get tired or bored at it. (Irony is that I’m not a foodie but love experimenting with new dishes for others). I just love experimenting with new dishes and eventually when it turns out to be tasty, edible and much appreciated, the feeling is so special. And smelling the aroma of your dish being cooked is heavenly.

It is an art not rocket science. It’s all in the dexterity and skills of your hands…put all your mind and heart into it and enjoy it heartily with your loved ones.

I haven’t known cooking till college days (except omlette, scrambled egg, maggi, dosa, tea). But the days when I lived outside my home, there was no other option but to cook myself. Also for the fact that I am very health conscious and hate hotel/ outside food, I learnt cooking.

In the initial days, I started experimenting with upma and pongal varieties and slowly the love for cooking started. What I observed is…the more you love cooking, the more you get to know about the various ingredients, vegetables and fruits, the more you get to know about their health benefits, the more conscious and wholesome eating habits you get, the more healthier you are and a healthier family.

Leave aside the fad of eating outside (occasional dining out is no harm)…it is very essential that women know cooking to keep their family healthy…

Cooking is all about getting to share your passion with the ones you love…and when someone enjoys, relishes and appreciates what you made with love the feeling is so special

I have cooked many things, some just by trial and error, while some from recipes (either from mom, books, magazines and even internet). I have experimented with Indian foods and vegetarian items only. Soon I should start experimenting with others also.

Some of my cooking experiments for others…

In my first office, I took my cooking thrice…Rusk Halva; Biryani, kurma, raita; Ven pongal, sambar, egg curry

When I cooked for my mom, sis and bro on their visit to Mumbai…rice, sambar, potato fry, papad, payasam

And recently I cooked for my special one…tomato rice, raita, omlette…raw mango rice and raita

Nothing great but nice memories these are…nice thing is that the dishes didn’t come out as disasters but was much liked by them.

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Writing is an outlet to my already overloaded brain. It is an effective outlet to our deeply seated thoughts and emotions. How long can I remember incidents and aspects of my life and things around me. Hence I write to chronicle them in the passage of time. It is a strong medium to express myself fully. I can reflect upon my thoughts later on. I observe and reflect on things around me and many a times I feel I get thoughts and ideas from nowhere, find meaning where others see none and have the urge to express them in writing. And the satisfaction and elation after you’ve penned down something is enormous.

My first original writing started with a poem (surprisingly!) and over time my writing skills have honed well but is yet to get shaped up to a great extent. I have realized that I can get to think and write something only when I strongly feel within the subject matter/ situation at hand. Otherwise I get short of words and ideas and cannot proceed forward beyond few sentences. I cannot write just for the sake of it. So what I write is what I strongly feel within.

I think and write, therefore I am -> “Cogito et Scribo, Ergo Sum”!

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